I'm most likely banned for life from New Zealand due to my drinking escapades which I will go into detail with part 2. Part 1 is going to be the wholesome family oriented material, which I did plenty.
We arrived in Christchurch after a much better international flight than the one I had taken from the US. They served free alcohol on this one. Part 2, I know, but STILL. We got on a shuttle that took us right to our hostel, which was right next to Christchurch's famous cathedral. It was pretty cool. What wasn't cool was the people in Christchurch. You'll see dead bodies with more life than the people there. To get to our bedroom, you had to walk through this common area which was completely packed full of people, who just laid there... They didn't even look up when we opened the door. AND they stayed that way all night. When we left the next morning, they were STILL just laying there. Now that I think about it, they could actually be dead bodies. Creepy.
Well, we left the next morning to catch our bus to Queenstown. Tourist capital of the world-- my friends would fit right in. We stayed at Hippo Lodge that in Queenstown, and the very helpful receptionist helped us plan some extreme activities. I was to skydive in the morning of the 17th and go on a Lord of the Rings tour that afternoon. The next morning we were to leave on a sweet bus tour of the south island called Kiwi Experience. We had a sweet bus driver named Steff, who is one of about 3 people who actually LIVE in New Zealand.
We drove to Dunedin, and toured the Cadbury chocolate factory, and that was actually all we did. I was frantically searching for any form of literature and God provided me with some Jehovah's Witness pamphlets, which I quickly read, and then donated them to the New Zealand Salvation Army's book donation box. Spread the word of Jehovah.
The next day, we went to some strange beach and found a sea lion who was nice enough to poop and pee for us before it passed out again. Steff got excited and started taking to us about drinking. Part 2 material. We drove to Invercargill where in Part 2, I will go into extreme depth about how drunk we got, and explain the worst thing I've ever done to any human being. ever.
But that's part 2, so people who prefer to believe that I'm a saint, don't read that. Pretend I just stayed in Dunedin at the chocolate factory feeding homeless and handing out Jehovah pamphlets.
After Invercargill, it was Valentines Day, and Tammy was to be my Valentine that day. She was extremely hungover and not looking too healthy, so I kept making Valentine's jokes at her expense. I'm a great Valentine, I know, but I at least looked adorable, like always. She looked like she was riding under the bus, not in it. We went to Te Anu that afternoon and we decided to make dinner for ourselves. Tammy made fun of me for not making her dinner for Valentines. hahaha, WAIT! When we decided to be Valentines, I wanted flowers, and she of course, wanted food. Chocolate to be precise. I asked why she didn't want flowers and her answer was, YOU CAN'T EAT FLOWERS!! hahahahahaa
We stayed the night in Te Anu and left the next morning for Milford sound. It's probably the most beautiful place I've ever seen, and there's no real way to make that funny... sorry
We ended up in Queenstown, and prepared ourselves for the next day's extreme activities.
WELL, skydiving got cancelled due to rain, and I just ended up sleeping all morning, and went on the LOTR tour, which was kinda neat, but not as neat as skydiving would have been. Especially since we had LOSER tour guides who kept making lame jokes that no one payed attention to.
The next day we went to Christchurch again and we flew back to Sydney. Tammy and I then hired a cab and made it to our house in Newcastle. Part 1 deserves a G rating compared to what Part 2 is going to be. But that's going to wait, cause I'm sick of writing now.
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