So, it's been awhile since I've done something really stupid whilst drunk, I will write a semi-boring segment about differences between Australia and the United States.
To make me an automatic liar, I'm starting off with a similarity... Australians constantly make fun of America, and claim to never want to be like an American. They only say this because I'm positive that they really are just wannabe Americans. I have evidence. As many of my closest friends and relatives know about me, I love Christmas. When we were in New Zealand, one town had their Christmas decorations still up. There were santas, snowflakes, sleighs, the works. When I went on a wine tour in Australia's Hunter Valley, I came by a 365 day Christmas store. There was a Santa that I posed with for a picture. Now, I'm a crap writer and I'm sure that many of you are now confused, but here's the kicker. It is Summer in Australia and New Zealand on December 25th, Christmas Day. There's no snow, sleigh, and Santa should want to be in shorts because it averages about 100 degrees most Christmases. United States does not OWN Christmas, but it's pretty obvious that Australia and New Zealand are just copying everything America does. EAT IT, OZ.
Now I'm probably just going to list things:
-Cottage cheese in Australia is not normal. It is a solid tub of white gunk and no liquid. It reminds me of the consistency of rice pudding.
-College students are loathed by everyone who isn't one. Being a student is not something you want well known.
-There are no pennies, and if something costs $2.97, it will be rounded to $2.95. There are also not $1 bills, but there are $1 and $2 coins.
-The fact that I even need to state this makes me think that no one who studied abroad in Australia has any common sense besides myself: Subway does NOT have $5 footlongs. There's something called foreign exchange that makes Subway have to up the price to $7 footlongs. Idiots.
-I take a train to school instead of a bus. I'm a city-livin boy.
-Australians are blunt, and I love that, but they are also blatantly racist. I hate that.
-Those who are at the brunt of the racism (asians and backs) take it out on white males that walk alone at night. I've been told about 5000 times not to walk alone or even in a group of 2 or 3.
-Aluminum cans are non-existent.
-They spell and pronounce Aluminum, "Aluminium"
-Liquor is about $50 to $70 a bottle. For a Liter.
-The cheapest beer is $36 for a 24 pack. Of bottles of course.
-Wine comes cheap. About $15 for a 5 Liter Box.
Okay, that's all I got right now. I promise I'll do something real stupid soon. Be on the lookout for a video of myself to hit facebook. I got absolutely hammered one night, blacked out all memory, and got a 20 minute video of myself taken by my loving roommates. Let's just say that the inside jokes of the dance 'The Worm', BREAD, and Taylor Swift will soon make sense to the world. I'm embarrassed of my video, but it gives the world a little taste of how crazy I can be.
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